Embodied Eating 101 | Ep.54

This show is about freedom. Freedom from your constant struggle with food and letting the size of your thighs determine your worth. Join me weekly for no whole fat, unfiltered girlfriend kind of conversations that will inspire, teach and empower you. As we tune into our own body's wisdom and tune out of the diet industry lives, we can live our most radiant, pleasurable and fulfilled lives. My name is Chanci dawn. I'm a non diet nutritionist embodiment and mindset coach. But most importantly, I'm a woman on a mission to grow a deeply connected and conscious relationship with food and my body. And I'm here inviting you to do the same. Let's go.

Hello, welcome to today's episode of it tastes like freedom. I am Chanci dawn, I created the it tastes like freedom program. And really my own version of embodied eating. Embodied eating is very similar to intuitive eating, okay. And there's a lot of different programs or different approaches called embodied eating out there. But mine is definitely unique. And my background is I wasn't, well, I am a nutritionist. And I really went into studying nutrition as a way to really try to figure out how to lose weight. And through my own growth, this was 15, my maybe 13 years ago, through my own growth through this time, I retrained to be a life coach, and an embodiment coach, and did all of these other programs around food and nutrition and health. And my own journey has brought me to a place of oh my goodness, I'm not good enough, right? This is a subconscious thought. But this was definitely the thought going on. I'm not good enough, I need to lose weight in order to be able to be acceptable to society standards. And I really struggled in so many ways. I've told my story before many times before on this podcast, so I won't really go deep into it. But if you do want to listen, one of the very first episodes talks all about what brought me here. But essentially, it went from like, I'm not good enough, I need to shrink myself. I find programs I built a like a big business, selling weight loss shakes to people really, again, sharing and hike telling them essentially that they aren't good enough unless they look a certain way. So I made a lot of money doing that. And throughout this entire journey, I came to a place about six years ago where I was like, Screw it, I am tired of this food prison and this body prison that I have put myself in because I'm believing lies, because I'm following someone else's definition of what I should be someone else's definition that is definitely not set by my soul. So I stepped back from everything. I did not talk about weight loss, I did not talk about health, I did not talk about nutrition. And I really took time to heal my own relationship with food and my body. And what I found in the end was freedom. This is the emotion that I feel most of all, when it when it comes to food, and my body. So I created a program called it tastes like freedom. And it's all of the wisdom, all of the knowledge, all of the lived experience that I've experienced, as well as what I've now help and continue to help many women find as well. So it tastes like freedom is the program that I have, I have one on one and two group coaching. But my what I call it is embodied eating. And I started calling it this when I trained to be an embodiment coach, because what I found is our wisdom is really held in our body. And we again, look outside of ourselves for the answers or we try to like logic it away and try to figure it out in our brains alone. So when we can go into our bodies and learn how to trust our bodies, this is where all of the freedom lies. Your body is definitely the best nutritionist you will ever know promise you that. But we need to learn how to listen to her in order to be able to really, really tune into her and find this freedom that you absolutely deserve. So I created a little slideshow. It's about half an hour long slideshow, and I have this as a freebie. People can download it and watch it and it's really just like an embodied eating 101 gives the overall framework about what I teach and what my program it tastes like freedom is all about, but I figured what a fun thing to do to come on the podcast and actually just go through the slide, go through the presentation, so you can hear it, if you're not really a visual, download a video and watch it kind of person, this is for you. And if you are, go to this show notes, and you can download the entire slideshow for free and watch it, you might even want to do it both. I mean, there's so much information in there, so much of wisdom that I'm going to share with you that listening to it, and then downloading it and watching it, and then sharing it with others and talking about it. And then connecting with me if you want to learn more, this is the very best way that you can find freedom and create this in your own life. And I'm going to be going through the four pillars of the it tastes like freedom program in here, but briefly, so if you're like, oh my gosh, I want to learn more. And if you're new to this podcast, definitely go back to the beginning, because I go through each pillar individually, pretty in depth, okay, so that'll give you a really like next level thing to do to kinda to dig into this knowledge a little bit more. And like I said, reach out to me, if you have any questions, and if you really ready to go deeper and work with me, I would love that.

Now, my take on embodied eating is really about relationship building. When I think of who we are, as humans, we are our body, our vessel, right? That we get to experience this beautiful human experience through, we are our brain, our thoughts, our mind, and we're our spirit. And when I talk about like listening to your heart, listening to that internal wisdom, I really feel that it's our spirit, it's our souls, it's this energy of who we are, it's wisdom that is eternal, and that's in our body. So when we learn how to listen to this, we're really loose at learning how to listen to the essence of really who you are, without all of the conditioning, all of the experiences that this life has put in you, okay, in your brain, it moves past that going into that, like, oh, wow, here I am, in my pure form, this is who I am. And this is what I want, what I desire. And I'm going to honor this.

So when we look at embodied eating, what we really want to do is we want to start to wake up these internal felt senses, many of us are numb, we are used to disconnecting from our body and really shutting down this wisdom, where we shut down these sensations because a lot of them are really hard to feel. But when we learn how to wake up the senses, and when we learn how to really tune in, we can learn how to love ourselves and be with ourselves, no matter what, in the good to feel sensations and in the ones that are more painful. And when you understand this, the painful ones can really be interpreted through, ah, I'm just a human having a human experience, nothing has gone wrong. How do I honor myself. Now this is the next part, honoring your cues. Your body is full of cues full of communication, that she can't wait, can't wait to share with you. So when we wake up our senses, we learn, okay, this is actually what's going on for me. And then the next step is to honor this to actually take action. When we're feeling these different cues. And through this whole experience, what we essentially do is we learn how to trust, we learn how to trust ourselves, and our body actually learns how to trust us that we will take care of her. So embodied eating, it's essentially falling deeply in love with you. The way you do food is the way you do life. I love this quote. And I think about it all the time, right? Do I feel chaotic? Do I feel disconnected? Do I feel fearful? Do what emotions are coming up? Or do I feel at ease and curious and calm and loving? All of this really reflects on how we show up in our everyday day to day life. So healing your relationship with food in your body is absolutely essential if you want to live a full, radiant, free life. So let's talk about the four pillars of embodied eating. The first pillar is pleasure, then we have permission, then we have compassion, and then curiosity. So let's start with pleasure. Let's dive in a little and like I said, you can go back and listen to The episode I have on pleasure in the very, very beginning to go a bit deeper with this, but this is going to be a nice little Coles notes overview. It is impossible to live pleasurably without living wisely well and justly, and it is impossible to live wisely well and justly without living pleasurably. Now, that's not my quote, I wish it was. But it is the Greek philosopher Epicurious, and I love it. I think there's so much wisdom and so much truth in that. So let's think about pleasure. When you think about pleasure, what comes up for you, for many women pleasure kind of elicits a feeling of shame. This is really common. And I equate this back to the story of Adam and Eve, whether you believe that or not, okay, this is so deeply ingrained in our culture. And it really just shows how women are looked and treated and taught, well, we are conditioned. So if you think of eat, okay, here's this curious girl, and she's in this garden, and she sees this tree full of ripe, gorgeous, luscious fruit. And all she wants is to taste it. She wants the pleasure. And she's told, if you taste this, you will have all the wisdom. And she's like, what's wrong with having wisdom? Why do I have to stay blind? What what is wrong with me wanting this pleasure. So she goes, and she grabs a fruit, and she bites it. And immediately she feels shame. And then she goes and tells this is what I did. And she covered herself. Her curiosity, her desire for more, created so much shame. And this has passed this story is passed down to our generation now. So even though we're not like, oh, yeah, Eve this eve that the message that we are inherently shameful, the message that our desires, our pleasure, there's something wrong with that. That is something that is so deeply ingrained in us. So think about this for yourself, where do you find this showing up? For me? Definitely, food has always been a been a big, big one. And this is, again, why I'm talking about food so much, and why I built my entire business around healing relationship with food and our bodies. So food is an interesting one, because it's like, ooh, here, this is pleasure, but not too much. Right? Or, oh, you should definitely enjoy this and look at this, and you need to eat and you need to, like, have all of this wonderful, yummy food, but don't gain weight, kg. So we're getting all of this mixed messages continuously thrown in our brains. And it is so stressful and so confusing to our precious brains and to our spirits. It's like I have this desire, but I can't have it. Right? I want that. But I shouldn't. What what in the heck could be more confusing and more stressful to a soul who just wants to have these beautiful human experiences? So when we think about this, and when we think what if pleasure isn't the problem? What if my desire for pleasure is actually this like, deeply? Animalistic need that I have? And this is the question, I want you to start asking yourself, where are you denying? And how is that showing up in your mental, your physical, your emotional, your spiritual health. So let's talk a little bit about our brat brain. So your brat brain is composed of two parts, okay, we have our reptilian brain. And this part of your brain is ancient, and she is only confer concerned with food, shelter and reproduction. She just wants to keep you alive and safe. And then we have our mammalian brain, which is our subconscious emotions. And as long as we're feeling good, this mammalian brain is like good again, you're alive, you're safe. But as soon as you're feeling stressed, this mammalian brain is like what the heck you are in threat, because she doesn't understand that stress today is very different than it was back in the day when we lived in caves. So any negative emotion was like, oh, no, you are being exited from the tribe, you're being chased by a predator or you don't have enough food, right? Your very life is at risk. So I take these two parts of your brain and I call her our brat brain. And I had a client recently and we were talking about the brat brain and working through things with what her brat brain was up to as she called her, her cheeky little sweetheart and I just loved that. I'm like, Absolutely. That is who this part of our brain is. And when we try to use willpower and self control role and we deny and when we deprive, this is incredibly stressful to this part of you, okay? She is like you are not getting the food you need, you're not getting the pleasure you need, you are denying yourself, you're feeling stressed. And so when you go on a diet, hey, at first, it seems Oh, this is great. This is wonderful, right? Like, I'm going to download all the recipes, I'm going to join the Facebook group, blah, blah, blah, all these things, this is new, she feels excited, she feels hope. But then because you are human. And willpower eventually fails. And self control does as as well. And restriction and deprivation. Those just suck right? Your brain hates them. So as like soon, usually within a couple of weeks of starting a diet or any sort of program, whatever you want to call it, losing weight on purpose, right? Doing whatever you can to shrink your body on purpose. It's a diet, let's just call it what it is. So after a while you're doing this and you're feeling these emotions. And she's like, Screw it. And she will do everything to drive you to do exactly what you're trying not to do. Because she's like, You are keeping me away from this. That is pleasure. I want it I want to feel better. I am stressed my life is at threat, you'd need to go eat the whole bag of Oreo cookies. Okay, so this is what's going on. And we don't even understand this. Like it's not we just think that we're failing. We think that Oh, I lack willpower. I lack self control. What is wrong with me? Okay, I'll eat all of those Oreo cookies and start again on Monday. So if you're caught up in this cycle, which is so common, please just like give yourself so much grace here. You are not failing the diet industry is you are human you are you are built exactly. To do exactly what is happening, to take care of yourself to avoid stress, avoid pain and seek pleasure. Okay, so hmm, let's just let that sink in. How does it feel to be normal? Oh, let me ask you that. Let that feel like that. That feeling just, ah, just coat over you. This is the truth. And because of this, dieting will never actually work. It is a $73 billion dollar industry that fails like 98% of the time. Time for something new, the embodied eating way. It tastes like freedom is the way to do this. Because instead of creating stress, you're creating connection, you're creating love, you are creating relationship. This is what your body wants, this is what your brain needs. So when we look at this ancient cheeky little sweetheart part of us, okay, if she's feeling stressed, she just wants pleasure. Pleasure to her means safety. And when she's feeling good, when she's feeling safe, her digestion works better her met metabolism revs up, she's happy, she feels satisfied. So we need to give ourselves pleasure on purpose, or your brain is going to seek it out for you.

And there's a difference here. So I want to talk a little bit about genuine versus false pleasure. So genuine pleasure. It feels calm, and it feels at ease. It serves you now an hour from now a week from now and so on. And it also leaves you feeling satisfied. So genuine pleasure is something that you are intentionally giving yourself food or otherwise, and focusing on the pleasure emotions of it. How does it feel in your body? How does it feel in your brain? Right? Like, are you absolutely present with this pleasure? So instead of feeling like, ah, oh, my gosh, I feel just like crap. I'm just going to eat all those Oreo cookies and be done with it. And like now I won't worry about them anymore. Instead of that. It's like, Oh, okay. Hmm, what do I want right now? I'm wanting pleasure and feeling kind of whatever it is, right? This desire for pleasure? Will food satisfy? Or do I need a walk? Or perhaps a cuddle or have sex or maybe self pleasure, right? Like whatever it is, your body knows. So when you go and you're like, I want this, ask yourself, what is it that I really want? What will truly satisfy? And if it is food, okay. Then we're going to talk a little bit more about this in a second. But there's a few different questions you can ask yourself to go deeply into really serve yourself here. So that's genuine pleasure. Now let's talk about false pleasure. False pleasure feels rushed and chaotic. Neck. It's not like I shouldn't I shouldn't I shouldn't I shouldn't feel but I want to, but I want to Okay, sound familiar. So it doesn't serve you, your brain thinks it does. Your brain thinks in the moment because it's taking you out of the stress cycle, right? That eating that whole bag of Oreo cookies serves you, but it does not serve you. So we need to like really ask ourselves and use logic here as well. This is where we gift ourself by making decisions from our hearts mind. Our hearts mind is your souls mind, this knows this is the wisdom of what's right for you. And then we use our reins mind to direct us forward right to be like, right, this makes sense. This is how I'm going to take care of myself. These are the actions I'm going to take. So we need to be aware of this. And we need to use our what I call our big sister, or C O brain. This is the more advanced part of your brain that can think logically that can plan for you and doesn't need a map immediate gratification. This part of your brain knows that you are not being chased by a saber toothed Tiger, okay, she's like, I'm safe. I don't need a whole bag of Oreo cookies. What do I really want here. Now, false pleasure also leaves you feeling empty, guilty shame often, definitely not satisfied and always longing for more. It never gives you what you truly want. So when you're looking at this, pleasure is not the problem here. What the problem is, is that we are self controlling, we're denying ourselves and we are fixed given getting these fixes, right fixes from pleasures that actually aren't pleasure, because we can't really be in them. We can't just feel calm and at ease and like, Ah, this feels divine. So what I asked for you right now is to think about where in your life do you have genuine pleasure, pleasure that is fulfilling and serving you? And where do you have false pleasure? Okay, pleasure. That is not actually it's counterfeit, and it's taking you out of your life. It's disconnecting you and it's not serving you really think about this. And this isn't to create, like judgment or shame. This is just curiosity, what is going on, because when you know what's going on, then you can plan and you can take care of yourself differently.

Permission, let's talk about permission, I love permission. A lot of people think if I give myself permission to eat, right, whatever I want, I will totally lose control. But remember, real pleasure feel safe to your brat brain. Okay, it's at ease, it's calm. And when you can go into this when you can be instead of this chaotic, I gotta have it, I gotta have it. I'll start again, tomorrow kind of energy. Instead of that you come in and you're like, Okay, I'm wanting this cookie. And then you get to ask yourself, and this is what I told you earlier, we're going to revisit so this is what we're doing right now. So you got to ask yourself, Do I really want this? And then you asked answer that yes or no. And then you ask yourself why? This why is really important, because it'll give you so much insight into what is really going on. Do I want this for me if I like go out for dinner, and there's crimper lay and it's a really good restaurant. I am going to have it because I love cramp relay. I love the way it looks the way it smells I love like cracking the sugar part and like that sound of it. And then the crunch with the like say delicate, silky custard like I can't think of anything better. It's so yummy to me. So I will have that when I go and I just give myself permission and I love every second of it. So do I want cramp or light? Absolutely. i Yes. Heck yes, I do. And I just told you why. If it is so divined to me. Do I want Oreo cookies? This is really interesting, guys. Because when I first started doing this work, I'm like, I can't even have Oreo cookies in my house. If I have them in my house. I just can't say away. I'm going to eat them all. And that is that fear I just talked about. But what happened is when I gave myself genuine permission, okay, and this means like really sinking into it. There's no shame. There's no moral issue around eating an Oreo cookie for goodness sake. When I really sunk into this, and I gave myself permission to eat them. I realized I actually don't even like the things they just tastes like this kind of bland cardboard sweetness to me now. And if you love them good on you, fine, right? But for me, this awareness came about and I'm like, Oh, wow, something that I thought was so charged. And so trigging actually, like means nothing to me. Now they can sit, they can go stale in my pantry, and I won't even be tempted along their sailing process to have have them right. And then it's like, oh, often I end up checking them. And this is also what's really interesting, because my kids used to be the same. I definitely restrict growing up like crazy, crazy restriction. So when they would go to friends houses, or would they would go out, they would pretty much binge, but I call store meat, they would just be going crazy at birthday parties. And I was embarrassed. I remember like, oh my gosh, my kids have such an issue with sugar because they won't stay away from it here. All the other kids are playing and my kids are just they're wanting to eat. But that wasn't the problem. The problem was that I was saying no, no, no, no, I was giving no permission. So there was such a dress such a charge to it. And now, we don't live like that anymore. We have this stuff in the cupboard, and it can sit there for a long time. And sometimes they eat it right up. And that's okay, too. We just take any sort of judgment away. And this is the freedom of it. And what happens in the end, when you live like this, you will see that you actually eat so much more honoring to your body. You don't have that the, you know, the cheat days or the binges or screw it. I'm going to start tomorrow. It just evens out. You have wonderful fuel food and you have delicious pleasure food and it is calm and it feels at ease. And if you feel like you're starting to get unbalanced, that's okay. That's just an opportunity to go what's going on for me here and how can I love myself more? It is such a beautiful way to live. So this question why this is essential? Am I feeling deprived? Am I feeling you know, sad? Well, maybe if you're feeling sad, you actually need to cry. You don't need the cookies, right? Or maybe you can have one and then be like, Okay, now. Ah, okay, that didn't fix it. So now I'm going to cry. Okay, so this is that relationship building and it takes, it's like, well, we'll talk about curiosity, is that right? But it really is this like curious learning about yourself. Just like any relationship, it takes time. And you need to put in the work, but it is so so worth it. So to recap, do I really want this yes or no? And why? And then the last thing you ask yourself is Do I like my reasons? Do I like my why does that align with who I am and who I'm going to be and how I want to take care of myself. Okay, so these are very personal, intimate questions. There's no right or wrong here. But when you calm that brat brain, right, that cheeky little sweetheart, and you can get curious, so much will be opened up to you. And here's the other thing, you are allowed to have physical and emotional hunger. When we eat, it actually does buffer it, our emotions, our vibrations in our body. And when we eat it buffers these vibrations, so we don't feel them so strongly. So emotional eating is a very real thing and nothing to feel shame about. But we want to shed the light on it. Is this serving me? And why am I doing this? And do I like my reasons for doing so. And when you can get curious about this. Often, it's like, okay, I'm just going to sit here with this emotion, or I'm going to go for a walk, or I'm going to call my best friend and talk to her about it. Or I'm going to call my coach, right when we can get past the shame and just like putting all of this false pleasure food in our bodies, trying to distract ourselves from what's really going on. On the other side of that is that opportunity to go, Oh, honey, what do you really need? So emotional hunger, pay attention to it physical hunger, play it, pay attention to it, it's all honoring. Now, the third pillar is curiosity. And this goes back to that question, what do I really need physical or emotional hunger? Another thing is, where am I getting all my pleasure? Is it mostly from food? Because this world your human experience is so full of different pleasures, that if you're only getting pleasure from food, guess what? So exciting. Get ready to be pleasure filled beings, because this work allows you to get curious about that. What do I really need, right? If it's not the cookies That's not actually going to satisfy what do I need to give myself permission to do to be to feel all of this. And again, this is your own personal experience. This is your own life. But I really invite you to do this because this is where the juicy life lies. More pleasure, please. Now, the other part is, if you are having a lot of cravings, okay, if this is like you're not really hungry, and it's not like this emotional thing that you're really needing to honor yourself, but you're just feeling like this. Out of control craving, like, you're like, I just want this even though I'm not hungry, and I'm not bored. I'm not sad. I'm not buffering. I'm just like being constantly drawn to this. What we want to ask ourselves is 1am I giving myself genuine permission? Or is it false permission? Counterfeit permission? Because if it's not real permission, then that cheeky little sweetheart is in the background going? No, no, no. Yes, yes. Yes. No, no, no. Yes. Yes. Yes. Okay. And this is very confusing to her. Because she's like, You shouldn't but you want it, you shouldn't, but you want it. But okay, you can have it, but you can't really, okay. So genuine permission is definitely something to work around here. And the other thing is, am I actually nourished enough when we're disconnected from our body, and when we're eating for a plan or protocol outside of ourselves, or if we're afraid of food, right? If it's come to coming to that point where it's like, I don't even know what to eat. Because everything feels scary and triggering to me. What can really happen is that your body becomes undernourished. And this can create extreme hunger. So a lot of times when people are recovering from eating disorders, they will feel this extreme hunger. And that's normal and to be expected, it's the body trying to bring you back into balance. So is this happening, or perhaps like many, you're a coffee drinker, and in the morning, you drink coffee, and then it depresses your appetite suppresses your appetite, sorry. And then it's like one o'clock, and you're only now starting to feel a bit of hunger. So you eat something, but you're like, I'm really not that much hungry. Maybe I'll have more coffee. And then in the night, it's like, oh, my gosh, I now feel ravenous and I'm eating everything in my pantry and fridge. If that sounds familiar, hon. It's because you're not eating enough throughout the day. So all of these different things, get curious about it. It's an all an opportunity to ask yourself more. How can I serve you? And I love this question, what feels most like love? Is it taking a walk? Is it feeling these emotions? Is it having the cramp relay? Okay, is it going for a nap? What feels most like love? How can I nurture and nourish myself now. So in this, your cravings really are an opportunity to learn how to love yourself more. And when we can take the charge off of them thinking that something's gone wrong, then they just allow us to have more and more curiosity, which blows the world wide open for you. It is so fun. Now, the last pillar is compassion. Remember, this is so important to remember, there's no on again off again, with embodied eating. This is not a diet. So it's not like yeah, today I'm on it. I'm on my embodied eating tomorrow. I'm off of it. And oh, I blew it. I messed it up. So I'm just not going to be an embodied eater this weekend. And then on Monday, I'm going to get right back on my embodied eating plan. No, there's nothing like that. It is a non linear process. It's all about asking yourself questions, learning how to tune in, honoring, trusting, re sensitizing, and being just curious and honey, coding yourself with compassion the entire time. What do I really need? Oh, wow, okay, I just over ate. I ate way past the point of fullness. And now I get to go, wow, Sweetheart, what was going on for you there? Right? Everything here is just an opportunity to build this relationship with yourself deeper and deeper and deeper. And creating new patterns takes time. It's okay, if this feels a bit chaotic in the beginning, when you start to give yourself permission to have genuine pleasure and to be able to ask yourselves these important questions. Sometimes it can go it can feel like ah, what the hell is happening, okay, because it's so new. If you're used to restricting the depriving and willpower and self controlling permission and pleasure is going to feel very foreign. But trust me as you continue as you stay true to building this relationship, your body will settle where it's healthiest, your brain will calm down, okay? And you'll start to have this beautiful dance with you and your body. And it is absolutely so fun and so free and like just such a live way to live. And when you have this relationship with your body, there's no such thing as guilt. Again, everything is an opportunity. There's no on again, off again, there's no struggling with judgment or shame, or any of those crappy emotions that never serve us anyway. And it is absolute freedom. So I really hope this slide show, the presentation served you and if you want to actually watch the slideshow, please go to the show notes. And just click on the link there, because it'll take you right there. And you'll also go on my email list so you won't miss any of the information I want to send you about different programs or offerings that I'm making, as well as I just give a lot of wisdom in these. I share a lot of things in the newsletter about what's going on for me personally and my own growth, as I'm working through continually to work through this until this embodied eating journey along with you. Thank you my friend, thank you so much for tuning in. Please don't forget to leave a review and a rating if this aligned with you if you felt like it was like heck yeah, this is awesome because when you do more people will see the show and hear it. So thank you so much.

Bless you. I honor you for doing this work. You are a superhero in your own life. Do not forget that. Take care bye bye